Kissing a Fool

Culture / June 05, 2018

by B. Wiser – Contributor

If misogyny lives on in the Philippines, it’s really because we allow it to. So much for our much-vaunted values of chastity and purity and fidelity that supposedly set the Filipina apart from her promiscuous Western counterparts. So much for fighting to safeguard the honor of our female workers overseas who are constantly fending off—many times unsuccessfully—the unwanted advances of their employers. So much for trying to teach girls and women to reject rape culture and that no means no.

All it takes is the president planting a kiss on the lips of an OFW in South Korea. Never mind that he apparently sought her permission before doing so. “Are you single?” he asked in Filipino. “You’re not separated from him? But you can tell him that this is just a joke.”

Joke or no joke, there was a clear imbalance of power at play here, with Duterte obviously wielding all the power. Joke or no joke, it was not just a disgusting and disrespectful gesture from a president, no less; it was completely unacceptable.

And what did the female OFW do? She allowed him to kiss her on the lips, she giggled like a silly schoolgirl, thrilled no doubt to have the president of the Philippines paying her such flattering attention. Did it even occur to her to say no and push him away? Of course not. Because we are still mired in our backward cacique mentality, a kiss from the boss could be her passport to a better life, one way or another. Perhaps she feels it elevates her status among her peers and singles her out as special. Perhaps she feels blessed even that this man, the embodiment to her mind of a true and powerful man in Philippine society saw fit to kiss her.

Such are the power structures she has grown up with and accepted all her life as normal that it didn’t even occur to her that she had a choice. Instead, as so many of us Filipinos do, having been raised on a diet of mind-numbingly inane noontime TV shows, she was blinded by his specious celebrity and basked in the glow of his vulgarity. And why not? Just like the poor children thrusting their hips suggestively on these noontime shows just to win P5000 pesos, she totally reveled in her 15 minutes of fame, even if it was at the grubby lips of a lizard slithering around in the guise of a president, and even if it was at the expense of her dignity.

Geez, girlfriend, show a bit more discretion and taste. Honestly, if I were you, I’d have lost my shit over a much hotter guy than Kim Jong Ewww.


Duterte, Kissing, Misogyny, OFW

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